2 min read
Where do all the kids who have special needs go when they become adults?
That questioned plagued me over the years, as I raised my son. I worried about Nate’s future so much that at times, anxiety would move through my veins, bursting into panic attacks. I would literally sit and have “self-induced” worrying days where I would panic about the unknown, future decisions that needed to be made, and problems that would occur. I cried about the possibility of death meeting up with me, way before I had an opportunity to make plans for Nate’s life. There were other times where my mind would become congested with the “What ifs”. “What if this happens, What if this doesn’t happen, what if I can’t?” They took over my mind, placing me in a stupor. It was tyranny on my brain…so painful that I could not stop it.
It was only through the Word of God that I realized that worry, fear, and anxiety of the unknown are a carcinoma that can grow inside of the body. It’s such a bad cancer that if I would have continued to let it control me, it would have resulted in my demise.
The only power I had to fight against this deviant was the Word of God. I realized that I couldn’t worry about Nate or my own life. I had to keep my eyes on God, and seek Him for everything (Matthew 6:33). Yet, most importantly, I had to trust in Him (Proverbs 3:5,6), knowing and believing that he had the answer to that question that plagued me for years. I didn’t have to worry, or allow fear, and anxiety to consume me. God has the answers and plans for Nate and all children with special needs.
And that is well with my soul.