Lessons I Learned From Raising a Child With Special Needs “God Will Provide”

Lessons I Learned raising a Child with Special needs "God Will Provide" CharleneBullard.com Faithtoraisenate.com purposedrivencharlene.com
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I stood at the door with my keys in my hand, ready to leave for a friend’s party.  As, I looked out the window, anxiety filled me, as 4:00 pm displayed on the living room wall clock and Nate’s childcare provider had not shown up or called.

I had spoken to her on numerous occasions about her lateness. She was always apologetic, as she explained that the bus was late or that there were some other type of issue that prevented her from being at my house at her scheduled time. I tried to be understanding, however, I was becoming annoyed, as her promises to be on time, remained broken.

I looked at the time, watching the minutes continue to go by and she was still not there. “This is it!” I angrily told myself.

As I watched the minute hand on the clock hit quarter after four, I saw her walk slowly up the walkway, then ring the doorbell. I opened the door seeing her smile, as if nothing was wrong. She gave no apology or excuse, as if she believed that her silence was better than acknowledging that she was late…..again.

My annoyance increased as I questioned her lateness. She then gave her repeated excuse of missing the bus, and that her cellphone died, making it impossible for her to call. I shook my head in disbelief as I calmly told her that today was her last day. I fired her!

I closed the door behind her and looked at Nate who was sitting on the sofa. It would be difficult to take him with me, I thought, but I had no choice.

As I drove, over the bridge in silence, irritation ran through my body as my car headed onto the expressway and into the neighboring state. I was tired of having this problem of inadequate and inconsistent help with Nate.

Over the years there were many childcare providers. Some of them were good, and then there were others that were horrible.

There was the one who I caught sitting in my dining room with her feet propped up on the chair, as she engaged in a loud and deep conversation on her cellphone, while Nate sat unattended in the kitchen eating bread…. NOT the food I prepared for him. Yes! I let her go.

Then there was another one who walked in the door, and instead of going through the protocol of how she needed to care for Nate for that day, she took out her cellphone and began talking. When I spoke to her about it, she told me that she was just paying a bill and didn’t think that was a problem. And yes!! She was terminated.

And then there was the one that I let go for calling out numerous times, usually minutes before her scheduled time. I’m not sure if she was upset, but she never returned my house keys, claiming they got lost in the mail. The agency was not happy to pay for changing the locks on my doors.

And there were the other problems from the no calls and no shows, not paying attention to Nate, watching inappropriate things on television, and much, much , more.  I was done!

When I arrived at my friend’s party, Nate in hand, she looked at me and could see the redness of my eyes, as I shared that I had to let the childcare provider go.

My friend sympathetically, reminded me of God’s faithfulness in my life. Her words soothed my anger as I realized that God will provide. He always did for me. From the times, I worried about getting to work on time because I had to place Nate on his bus; to rushing to pick him up from school after work, and having help when I needed to take graduate classes at night. God always gave me what I needed. There was always a childcare provider, whether someone was in my home to help, or family and friends cared for Nate. God ALWAYS came through for us.

So, as I drove home, with Nate in the back seat, listening to music and praising God, my heart sang as I rejoiced. I thanked Him for always being our provider what He was about to do!

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