“You can’t have a Meltdown!”
I use to tell myself this when I became upset at my child’s behavior. I would give myself a swift and stern military style pep talk, saying….
“Charlene, you can’t act like this, you are the mother.”
“You have to be strong.”
“You have to get it together.”
I would tell myself this because I had allowed myself to let my child’s behavior make me act, “crazy.” There I was in my bedroom on the floor, crying, screaming, and yelling up to the ceiling as if it were heaven, begging God to give me relief or a reprieve from raising my child.
Over the years, I have tried my best to stop these meltdowns, however it was difficult. There were many moments where Nate would grab me, scratch me, pull my hair, and spit on me, where I’d find myself having one of my meltdowns. Then afterward, I would be overcome with guilt.
After a while, I decided that I could not feel guilty about my meltdown.
I was NOT going to feel guilty!
I had to truly understand that being a mother is not easy. No matter if you have a child with special needs or not. Parenting is not something that we will master. We may get better at it, things may become smoother, as we learn what works for us, but I don’t believe it is ever mastered. And as we raise our children, there will be great times, and difficult ones. We will encounter moments when one day we are happy and we wish that every day was like that day. Then we will have a day, straight out of a horror movie, where we want to run far away. I have had those days and I’m sure other parents have too.
And having those bad days that lead us into having a “mommy meltdown,” where we become emotional, angry, and cry, is all right. We are human. We are not perfect and we don’t have it all together.
So have you’re “Mommy Meltdown” and don’t feel guilty about it.
Then when you are done, take a deep breath, count if needed. Then go back to raising your children and being the best mother you can be.